Rainy Days and Mondays

I had the most wonderful waking up this morning. It was early, but not too early and I laid in bed, hearing a beautiful sound. With eyes still not open to the day before me, I began to realize that a soothing, steady rain was falling just outside my open windows. And as it fell, drenching the ground with its gentle force, I began to feel a sweet soaking in my spirit. I had no words at the time, but now I know it was a nourishing of thankfulness, an attitude and perspective that is too often so very parched and dry in my life. I complain instead of give thanks. I groan instead of sing.

I have never understood how to give thanks in everything. I've heard lots of opinions on what that means. I've tried some ideas of my own- making lists of things I am thankful for, sending cards or emails to say thank you, repeating the mantra, 'I am thankful' through gritted teeth and a fake smile. But no advice or effort  on my part has helped me to do any better at living a life of thanksgiving. And then something happened today, before I could pull myself together enough to have even a chance of trying to contribute, God woke me with the sound of the rain.

First Thessalonians 5 says, "¹⁶ Rejoice always, ¹⁷ pray without ceasing, ¹⁸ in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. ¹⁹ Do not quench the Spirit."

You see, all this time I had been stopping short, not folowing all of the directions. I read the command to perpetually rejoice and pray and give thanks, and added those to the mental list of things I could never really do. And the ironic part is, I was right in assigning them to that list. On my own I can't do any of those things. I can not rejoice always. To be honest, I can't even rejoice the majority of the day on my own. I certainly have not mastered leaving the 'amen' off of my prayers, and I've already told you about my sad lack of thanksgiving. But because of my inability, I had decided I was okay with placing an asterisk next to those directions, and writing the footnote that says something like, "God would like you to try your best to do these things, but He didn't really mean that He expects to see them all the time."

But like only God can do on a rainy, Monday morning, He shattered my self-focused thinking and washed me with the Word. I can not do anything good on my own, but as long as I am not quenching the Spirit who is alive in me, I can not stop doing good. What I had looked at as impossible, I realize now lies not in my effort, but in my openness to the work of the Spirit in me.

My perspective was different today. It is different. How do I give thanks in everything? I can't, but the Spirit of God inside of me never stops. When I chose to let His life live through me, thanksgiving becomes a way of life and a beautiful lens through which to view the world.

After the rain.

Taken Tuesday, May 15.